Control. It has such a strong hold on us. For many, control is like our safety blanket. But the truth is, the stronger your grip, the less you actually have. Here are my tips for releasing control and leading a healthier life.
1. What you don’t have control over…
When it comes to others, we try so hard to have control over them - what they say and how they should behave. You think you can help that person. You think your decisions and opinions are the only thing to make them happy or lead them down a better path. "As long as they just follow and do as I say, they will be better." Wrong! Here’s the reality, you can’t control what others think, feel, and do. Stop trying because it’s not going to work. All you are doing in enabling their bad behavior and sinking yourself into a deep hole of misery.
2. Why don’t you try this instead…
You can control your thoughts. You can control your behavior. Start using I statements instead of ”you should…” Stop putting in your opinion unless someone asks for it. And, stop making up excuses why you are the exception to this blog. “Well, I’m the mom so..” “Well she needs my help because…” Let me be blunt. You are not the exception and there is no excuse to the rule. If someone asks for your opinion, give it. Control your thoughts and behavior.
My take away…
I think a lot of us try to control situations because we think we are helping. We’re not. You don’t have control over someone’s thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. You can’t change them. You do have control over yourself. So why don’t you stop worrying about the other person and focus on yourself.
Let’s keep the conversation going. How did you let go of control and what control did you take back?
This is Breeze Counseling's blogspot were you can find useful tips and self-help information. Please feel free to leave your comments.