1. Remove negative people from your life. We all have been in those relationships when we feel something is off or not right. We might even recognize that the relationship is no longer good for us. But for some reason, we stay. Why? Is it because we think that person will change? Or maybe, in time, the relationship will improve? Meanwhile, everyday that we hang on to these negative relationships, is another day we feel unhappy, stressed, frustrated, sad, angry, confused. Stand up for yourself. You do not deserve to live your life everyday with negativity. Be confident to end the relationship.
2. You are the only one to make yourself happy. Have you ever been in a situation and thought, "I'll call person x. He'll make me feel better and will help me make this decision." You call, no answer. You finally get ahold of that person and find yourself not getting the support you need. Then, every time you go back to that person for help and he/she does not tell you what you need to hear, you spiral downward. You feel that not only do you have this huge problem but you have no support either. The truth is, you are the only person who can make you happy. Don't rely on someone else to fulfill that need. You can make your own decisions and help yourself.
3. Don't be afraid to be alone. Society says that we should be social. We should be going out on the weekends and having family plans on Sunday afternoons. When we don't fit this model, we become depressed. We think everyone else is out doing things, and we are not. You check social media just to prove you are right. Stop self-sabotosing. The truth is, not everyone has a stacked social calendar. It is ok to be alone sometimes and feel comfortable with it. However, if you find yourself isolation, you need to make a concious effort to get out. Sign up for a class at the park district. Sign up to do some volunteer work. Do something to get out of the house.
4. You are normal. It doesn't make us happy to feel like we don't fit the norm. What really is normal? Is there one person that you can clearly point out as normal? Everyone has their own stories and there is no normal person. We tend to put on this mask that makes it appear as if everything is fine. The lesson here is to be yourself in any situation. It might take some getting use to. Eventually, people will start to connect and feel drawn to you. Who knows? Maybe coming out of your shell will inspire someone to do the same.
5. Don't internalize others' comments. I woke up the other day and thought to myself, "Today, I am going to walk with confidence. Yesterday might have been a bad day but, today is a new one." I put on my best outfit and strutted out the door ready to go. I get to work and someone makes a judgmental comment about me. Wow. Everything I told myself today just went up in flames. Why do we let other people's comments affect us? Why do we have such a hard time deflected those statements. Because we internally allow it. Someone says something awful and we start asking ourself, "Could they be right? Am I really..." Or we agree with them by thinking, "Yep. They must right. I am..." Stop the negative self-thinking. Make a conscious effort to deflect those statements. They go in one ear and out the other.
I'm not saying that these five ways to happiness will occur over night. In fact, it will take practice. Right now start standing up for yourself. You are normal. Deflect negative thinking. Be ok with being alone. Remove the negative. And most importantly, you are the only one to make yourself happy.